Hash #998 was held on 16th September 2017 at the Kings Residence, Cabier, St Andrew. The hare for the hash was Lucy Murchie “Doggy Style” assisted by the “Girly Crew”.
Hashmaster’s Report: Hash #998
Attendance: 205
Great, after last week’s romp amongst the mountains, it was nice to go on a rather “flat” hash. Well, Ok, there was a climb uphill near the start of the hash, but the rest of it was “relatively” flat. Relatively, of course, to the previous hashes. I ended up going on the Walker’s Trail this time around because a certain someone (I won’t mention any names, ok “Doggy Style”?) absconded with the sign for the Runners’ Trail (more on that later) before I reached the turnoff point. So, the trail was short, but very nice, and included a small beach section too, which was interesting, because I was told that there would be a beach section for us to do a little cleanup campaign, and then I was told that there was not going to be a beach section, and then suddenly, we end up with a beach section. Confused? Yup, I was too, but a couple of hashers still walked with their garbage bags, so we managed to do the cleanup as planned.
Some other things:
1 Two virgins showed up late for the devirginization ceremony. Well, we can’t have that, so they were down-downed accordingly. And one virgin didn’t give up her new shoes for a blessing before the hash. Not a problem – we did the blessing afterwards, when her left shoe was a little “seasoned”, muhaha.
2. Birthday celebrations for Roach, Neil and “Pink Panther”. Beers (and it seems a bit of ice, for the first two, and water for the last.
3. Yes, so I was about to down-down “Doggy Style” for pulling the Runners’ Trail sign too early, and a former hashmaster, “Peak Freak” tried to turn the tables on me! However, they left me holding a warm beer in my hand while “Peak Freak” was giving his reasons for why I should receive the down-down instead, and I had to do something with that beer, so… muhaha, hope you enjoyed it, “Peak Freak”!
4. Oh, “Anal Retentive”, the Karma Bus just keeps coming for you over and over, doesn’t it? Last week it was for pouring cold beer down hashers’ backs, and now it was for doing the same with ice instead.
Next week we’re in Carriacou…
On-on!
Hash #997 was held on 9th September 2017 at Radix Park, Mt. Parnassus, St. George and the hare for the day was “Respect De Banana”.
3.The Karma Bus finally arrived for “Anal Retentive”, who had been treating poor hashers who were receiving down-downs to what I’m going to call the “Karim Maneuver” – the dumping of a cold beer down the hasher’s back. Well, just like Monsieur Joseph-Ignace Guillotin eventually got to experience the device he helped to dreamed up, it was time for “Anal Retentive” to be treated to the move he’d been inflicting on others. Oh, and someone added ice – nice move 😊.
Hash #995 was held on 26th August 2017 in Moya and the hare for the day was “Crisis” and friends.
Anyway, “New Vagina” (Mona Bruno) is going to be leaving us for a while, as she’s off to China this week to further her education, so of course we had to send her off hash-style and all. But what to do, what to do? Then “Crisis” showed me this big bag of shredded paper that was left over from setting the hash, and suddenly it all came pretty clear Hopefully “New Vagina” will be able to get all of that paper out of her hair before it’s time to travel…!
Hash #996 was held on the 2nd September 2017 at Grey Bar, Vincennes, St. David – with “Bird” being the hare for the day.
While Sherri Roopchand Wholesaleyachtparts and others showed off some amazing gymnastics, it was returning hasher Kishon Brathwaite that took the prize, with the full legs-in-the-air backward cartwheel down the last muddy section, ingeniously using his head as a brake, and thereby earning himself the hash name of “Skid Mark” in the process. Well done Kishon, er, Skid Mark!